lonely

Image

You have tried so hard to avoid yourself

 But every day is a million breaths reminding you,

How much you have failed…

 

Deep in the mind .. roaring like a dilapidated lawn mower.

The id is cutting out peaces of you…

replacing them, with peaces of YOU…

like blades of grass in the wind on a summer day

 blown from connection to the earth

to be fertilizer for birth

of a new fool, planting roots in the corner of darkness, sprouting green to feed

the hungry caterpillars

greedily, devouring.

 

You have tried so hard to avoid yourself

But everyday is a million breaths reminding you,

How much you have failed.

 

Knifes in the stomach..

Pains in the chest..

Obsessing thoughts ..  plural desires..

Uncomfortable fantasies leak in your mind…

Religions and psychologies..janitors of a kind

Mopping up the juices, removed from the rind.

 

SCREAM!!!!!

SCREAM!!!!!

There is no acceptable solution

No plausible belief

That leaves you being

Who you feel you should be.

There is pressure to accept

What is defined and attributed

But you redefine everything

Leaving you empty and isolated.

Where do you walk when every where is lonely,

  And You have tried so hard to avoid yourself

but every day is a million sharp breaths, reminding you,

Just how much you have failed…

 

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39 thoughts on “lonely”

  1. This is great:

    “There is no acceptable solution

    No plausible belief

    That leaves you being

    Who you feel you should be.

    There is pressure to accept

    What is defined and attributed

    But you redefine everything

    Leaving you empty and isolated.”

  2. I love it, but I think we have all felt this at some point in time or another… but the question is… do we stay there, empty & isolated, or do you move on…. learning from previous lessons life has put before us. (But I could be way off base cuz my mind in scrambled right now :D… )

  3. Wow. Those repeated lines (And You have tried so hard to avoid yourself/but every day is a million sharp breaths, reminding you,/Just how much you have failed) were like a blow to the stomach. So powerful, and so identifiable, for me at least. Wonderful poem, however sad a place it comes from.

      1. thank you very much for this nomination. I checked out your site a little.. It says you are a spoken word artist. Where do you perform? This is something I would like to do more.. at least read my stuff but I don’t know how to get started.

      2. No problem. I like your blog. I am a spoken word artist. I perform at slams and gigs.

        I’d say the best thing to do is first attend a slam or open mic session. And then perform at open mics.

      3. right on! I am in Tucson. It’s hard to find anything to do here and my poetry though raw is not the type of stuff that normally goes over well at a slam. So I feel stuck with where to perform or read.

      4. AZ. Oh wow. I can see how that would make it harder though a completely prejudiced statement since I know nothing about AZ. Don’t let rules limit what you perform or read though. And get out. Travel a bit. Go to cities that might be more welcoming to your style. Or create your own slam group. Find people who share your tastes, a large group of people. And keep doing what you do.

  4. Thank you for stopping by my blog and liking my latest post! We all feel this way at some point in our lives, but the determining factor as to whether we fail or succeed is what we choose to focus on. Do we choose to focus on our failures and live in the past or do we dare to believe that somewhere out there in that dreaded sea of impossibility, is a job that exists that only we can do. Strong work!

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